I guess we know the purple carpet doesn't match the drapes (The Happytime Murders 2018)

210.

The Happytime Murders

 

 

 

 

 

5.5/10

 

We are stepping into a crazy alternate reality where puppets, who know they are puppets, live alongside humans. The puppets though are treated as a marginalised group for their troubles. The trailers for this movie make it look like something that is a step above.  A cross between Who Framed Roger Rabbit due to the investigators and The Muppets, which is mainly because the same producers are involved. With a cast of Melissa Macarthy, Elizabeth Banks and Maya Rudolph, each has had their own success in someone's eyes. It always leaves you wondering whether the best parts have been shown in the trailers to get the audiences through the doors, so let find out. Let's find out if we are being taken for muppets.

The story follows our usual detective narrative of 'who dun'it?'. We follow a disgraced cop named Phil Phillips who must team up with his old partner played by Mellisa Macarthy. They used to work together until Connie, Macarthy's character was held at gunpoint and Phil had to save her, failing and instead, killing an innocent puppet on the sidewalk in front of his own daughter. This lead to Connie signing a petition to stop Puppets ever becoming cops again. From there Phil turned into a private detective in a seedy office.
The main story follows a group of old tv hosts, all puppets who get murdered one by one, leading to an investigation and Phil needing to get involved due to a cross over with his own job, a side mission/storyline which is for a female puppet named Sandra White. She fears for her life after a serious of threatening letters. This character is over the top sexually teasing and Phil can't control himself. This leads to a crazy and at first, a funny sex scene between the two, which then becomes a little cringeworthy.

 It reminded me of the scene from Team America all those years ago. This is a running theme as things start to get a little cringy. We are introduced to Phil's actual love interest, played by Banks and the pair of Connie and Phil begin to try to solve the case, but begin failing miserably. Phil even gets set up for killing his old love interest. She is now the wife of Sandra, in a full circle move and Sandra blames Phil for the death. Connie must prove that her old partner is innocent as their relationship is now growing strong once more. She heads to Sandra's apartment where she finds a hidden room full of plans to from Phil. It turns out she truly has a motive. She was the daughter of the man shot dead by Phil. Although it was an accident, just like every woman in history, she never let him forget about it. Connie grabs Phil and they head to the airport to stop Sandra together. He tries to apologise for his mistake but it falls on deaf ears. It turns out that Jenny, Banks' character is still alive too. A staged death to set up Phil but Sandra knocks her out to steal some money for herself. Connie is taken at gunpoint and Phil is put in the same position as he was years before. This time he doesn't miss and Sandra's fluffy brains are everywhere.

They are both reinstated as partners and Phil even asks her old assistant from the Private Detective agency, played by Maya Rudolph,  out on a date.
I couldn't wait to see what this movie had in store when I had seen the trailers but in fairness, it far from lived up to the potential. The storyline was a normal crime drama with all of the humour added in, which at times, became a little bit tedious. There were some clever twists nonetheless but nothing that would stick and get you saying, 'yeah, great movie'. Not too sure what you can say about the acting with 50% of it being voice acting. I enjoyed the dryness of Phil's character but there is something about Macarthy that I far from enjoy. It always seems forced humour and that for me is never a winner. If you are after some slap-stick comedy, over the top humour and needless crass, then this is for you. In my opinion, it had to tools to be up there with Rodger Rabbit and Team America but it did more than fall short.

Nothing...Nobody will separate us (The Secret of Marrowbone 2018)

209.

The Secret of Marrowbone

 

 

 

 

 

7/10

 

 

 

It's been a while since I got to see a Scream Unseen thanks to Odeon and the really need to do more of these. Obviously, there aren't too many horrors at times but I can't get enough of them when they do come around. The trailer for this one had been pretty decent and with only one face that I recognised, that being Anya Taylor-Joy fresh off the back of being in Split, sometimes it helps to have some freshness. We would be following around a family of four, all young siblings, as they struggle to live with an evil presence in their home. Let's find out if this film should have remained a secret.

The movie begins with a family moving into their old, run-down home in America. It's their childhood home and their new hideout from the serial killer father of the family.

 The mother makes them all assume their maiden name of Marrowbone and soon her health goes onto a downward spiral. The children take their minds off things and head down to the beach where we meet Allie, a local girl who takes up an interest in the oldest kid Jack. Soon, the mother passes and the kids need to keep this a secret due to Jack not being 21 and able to be a legal guardian. The mother has always said she never stole the box of money that the father stole but on her death bed, she admits to Jack that this happened. He takes this down to a cave to hide.

As time goes on, the father has escaped is standing outside their house, firing a bullet through their window.6 months into the timeline, Jack bikes into town to grab some groceries and head to see Allie. On the same visit, a local businessman named Tom pops in to see Allie too. He's clearly interested in her but doesn't notice Jack there. Once he discovers his presence, he lets him know that he will come by his house in the morning to pick up the last payment for their estate. This also means he needs a signature from the mother. Jack returns home to his worried siblings and he knows he needs to retrieve the money from the hidden box. We are getting a little flashback as we see the father hitting Jack with the money box at the cave, only a glimpse though and then we are back to normal as the money is retrieved and Tom arrives for the payment. He isn't happy that's it's in cash and he'll be even less happy when he finds out that the daughter has forged the mother's signature.

Later that night, the family sit to play some games and a cloth drops from a mirror. Instantly the younger siblings start to panic, believing that the ghost as returned because they used the blood money. The movie starts to take that slight turn into more a horror as there are now bumps in the night and suspense due to lack of musical score. The next morning, Jack climbs to the roof and drops the box of money down the chimney.

As a part of the story, we flip back now and again to Allie and Tom's awkward relationship, He knows about Jack's father and reveals this to Allie as a kind of one-up on him. She ends up asking Jack about this and the camera pans out, showing the second eldest brother spying on them both.

 Back at the house, Billy goes a little mental with the fact that Jack is allowed out to socialise whilst the others must stay in for their safety. The is the first rift we are truly seeing open. Whilst all this is going on, the youngest brother named Sam, steals Jack's keys, which leads him to their mother's room. In there, he finds the file on his father, plays an old music box that his mum used to play for him and then finally, letting a sheet slip from the mirror, letting in the ghost. We catch glimpses of a figure underneath the fallen sheet, making it's way to Sam until he passes out. Jane, the sister, passes this information onto Jack who then tells the family that it was just a story they made up because they actually trapped their father in the attic that day when he came with the gun. They left him up there to die.

 

Meanwhile, Tom has offered Allie to come with him on a trip away. Allie finally admits that she is with Jack, leaving Tom upset and in turn, he gives her the newspaper clippings about Jack's old man. At the house, the local raccoon has popped in for dinner and in between the walls, it gets through a hole, with Jane trying to coax it back out. As she reaches in, a ghoulish hand grabs back at her. Tom is offered a hob away but must buy some shares to get the job. He doesn't have the money for this and the rumours of the siblings keeping that money catch his eye. He heads to the home and tells them that he knows the signatures from before are forged. They must give him the money to move away otherwise blackmail shall be on its way. Back up to the roof, but this time it's Billy. He heads down without Jacks' knowledge. He finds that the box has moved, there's a ripped apart raccoon along with other animal carcases and soon, a tiny figure emerges from the shadows. Shocked, Billy tries to climb back up the chimney, only just making it with his life and a massive gash to show for it, dropping the box on his escape.

The movie then begins to flip in the timeline once more. Allie is asked to meet Jack at the tree where they first ever made contact. There, she finds a book that is handmade and tells the story of the siblings and their father Simon. It reveals that the siblings are actually dead. It is written all of the way up until the bullet comes through the window. Back on that day, Jack tells the youngsters to head into the attack to hide. He heads out to give his father the box of money at the cave. They still end up having a fight with Jack stabbing his father in the neck, before he recovers and knocks Jack off a small cliff. Simon heads to the house and breaks into the attic where the siblings are hiding. He kills the three of them before Jack can make it back. He locks his father upstairs with his crime and bricks up the door. Jack takes his fathers gun and just as he is ready to pull the trigger and kill himself, his mind breaks up into the multiple personalities of his siblings. He begins imaging them day after day and covers the mirrors so that he can never truly see that he is all alone. This is all going on not long after the first day that they met Allie. After the first scenes of them meeting, looking back, you never saw them all in a scene together again. From then on, it is always just Jack and Allie. She races to the house with her new findings.
At the house, Tom has arrived for his money and after hearing weird sounds, decides that heading to the attic is a great idea. He smashes down the bricks and enters, instantly being set upon by Simon after finding the bodies of the siblings. Throughout the movie, we see Jack painting a ceiling stain, time and again, which must be their blood seeping through. Allie arrives to hear voices coming from the sibling's man-made safe space. In there, he finds Jack talking to himself as all his own siblings. In Jane's voice, she/he tells Allie that she needs to take care of them and when Allie brings Jack back around, he shouts at her to leave them all alone. She heads into the attic to find Tom after noticing his briefcase on the counter. Getting to the attic, she finds Tom with his throat ripped out before Simon squares up to her.

She shouts for the siblings to come and protect her and that's exactly what happens. Jack enters and shoots Simon before embracing with Allie. The film cuts to 12 weeks later and Allie is at a doctors appointment. The Doc is pleased to hear that Jack has shown no further signs of his multiple personalities and he gives Allie some more medication to take back with her. Returning to the house, she puts the meds in an already full cupboard and heads to Jack to gift him with a framed picture that they took on their first day together with all the siblings. She is continuing to let Jack believe that his siblings are still with him and after her walking back into the house, we see Jack look across the field at his happy sister and brothers.
This was a movie that promised horror but turned into a thriller instead. It had all the making of a horror with talks of ghosts, bumps in the night and suspenseful moments but in truth it turned into a good old fashioned thriller. There were a few jump scares and usual characteristics that come along to get the audience on the edge of their seats but more importantly, you couldn't tell what the main secrets were. Because of this, the storyline was compelling at times because you were kept guessing enough to be interested in the main plot and it's side stories. Once you could understand the timeline, it was easy to enjoy. The acting was on par and with George MacKay as Jack, the acting went from a normal, slightly troubled and caring older brother to a completely broken male. He portrayed this really well with the reveal and turning point towards the end. Overall, it was a really enjoyable watch for a movie that didn't seem to hang about in the cinemas for too long. I would recommend this one if you do like a bit of a surprise at the end but never expect a masterpiece. It was nice to see a horror that didn't deal with possession of some sort.

Oh my God! I got learning herpes! (Night School 2018)

 

208.

Night School

 

 

 

 

5/10

 

The title of this movie is going to give us exactly what we expect. Kevin Hart and a bunch of seemingly familiar faces are heading to night school to further themselves after dropping out in their younger days. With Tiffany Haddish, who seems to be hot property within the terrible comedies floating around, will be playing Carrie the teacher and no-one else really mentioning right now, I don't have too much hope for the movie. It can bring some laughs, with is the point of a comedy but sometimes, they may need a little more. The director, Malcolm D. Lee has always spouted out some black comedies and if I'm honest, I haven't enjoyed one. Let's find out if we are going to get a lesson in laughter.

The storyline is a very, very simple one. There isn't too much need to get into it but as you can imagine, it mainly revolves around the night school. Before we get into class, we are giving a little bit of a background into Hart's character. Teddy is the name and not being great at school is the game. Back in 2001, we see Teddy settle down to his SAT's and failing miserably. He can't concentrate to revise and only his Grandmother has sympathy for him. His Grandfather and twin sister just think it's all excuses. The next day in the school hall, Teddy sits down to his test and with in minutes, declares he is done with school and walks out. We then change to the present day and Teddy is seen driving a sports car and you instantly think he's 'made it' somehow. He's dropping his girlfriend Lisa off to her office and Teddy works as a successful salesman. It's a barbeque shop and the owner claims that one day, he'll leave the company to Teddy. Later that night, he's out for meal with his girlfriend and her friends and Teddy offers to pay. That's until he realises the price. He rips out his pubes, plants them in his dessert and then tries to get it all for free. The head waiter, Luis, believes he planted them himself and argues the point until the Head Chef comes out and believes Teddy, firing the waiter and giving them the meal for free. Even the friends didn't believe Teddy. The same night Teddy takes Lisa to the shop and plans a proposal but when he pops the cork on the champers after getting a yes, it smashes against a BBQ handle, turns on the gas and gas, along with the candles doesn't work well and the building explodes with Teddy inside, sending him hurling through the air and into the windshield of his car.

Time to find a new job and he heads off to his mate Marvin's company to ask for a job. He BBQ boss took the insurance money and legged it to Florida. Teddy, not having a GED, means that a job is hard to come by and it's the same with Marvin's company. Teddy knows he needs to get one but goes back to Lisa and lies, telling her that he's got the job. He heads off to sign up for school and in the traffic, comes across a woman talking really loud on hands free and has a falling out with her. This woman is Carrie Carter, played by Tiffany Haddish and we already know that she plays the teacher. On arrival on the school, things go from bad to worse and the Principal is someone who Teddy used to make fun of in school. He relishes the chance to deny Teddy his GED but saying that they don't offer night school there. As he is showing him the door, they bump into Carrie and discuss why she is there when she is the night school teacher. Teddy obviously becomes aware that the Principal is full of shit and instantly enrolls. Carrie always pulls up the Principal for trying to act gangster with his use of language and body language. This is a running theme throughout the movie.

 

 

Once the lessons start, we are introduced to the other students, one being the waiter from the beginning, which is the obvious conflict other than Teddy and Carrie. He tries to get ahead by bringing in tacos for Carrie but she ends up handing them out to everyone instead. She doesn't like this approach at all. We have the waiter, a mother of three named Teresa, Jaylen who is worried about a robot apocalypse, Molly who is trying to avoid jail time, MacKenzie who is getting his GED to show his son not to make the same mistakes he did when young and finally Bobby, who is played by Fat Joe, who is in jail and learning through Skype. In the meantime, Teddy finds a job as an advertiser at a chicken shack, dressing as a chicken and spinning a sign.

 

 

 

 He also has to sneak around to hide it all from Lisa. This is a story that never ends well and it's only a matter of time until she finds out. During the first lesson, Bobby is attacked in jail and the Principal walks in to see that Teddy has enrolled. He sits in as Teddy is called up to work at the board, struggling, until Carrie gives him a hint, promising that it would be the only time.

Knowing that he is screwed, Teddy tries to convince the other students to steal the GED answers for the test and they all meet up to do so. Mac goes hard and chokes out a janitor for no reason. They all get to the Principal's office and all have to hide as he enters.

 

 Teddy notices that the Principal is heading onto Facebook and adds Lisa as a friend. The Janitor wakes back up and starts screaming, leading to a window for everyone to escape. Stewart, the Principal, puts the school on lockdown and there is no option but for everyone to escape to the roof and make a giant leap to safety. Mac tries the jump, fails and messes up his arm, with Jaylen seeing the evidence and spewing on him to good measure.  Carries finds out what happened and Teddy owns up so the others can stay in class. He is kicked out and this is the turning point in the movie that we are about to see all the badness. He meets with Carrie in private and asks for another chance. She finally agrees, running some tests on him first and finding out that he is multiple learning difficulties. We are actually on the up as Teddy is put through extra tests to prepare and starts to get on with his classmates.

As things take a turn for the best, the class attend the school dance, bringing out some old school moves and wowing the students. Carrie and Teddy share a dance but it's interrupted when Lisa turns up. Stewart has invited her to come and check out the school for renovations, which is her day job. Teddy is forced to explain himself and Lisa doesn't take it well, mostly because he felt he had to impress her and not just being himself. She gives him his ring back and advises that he doesn't come home. He must return to his Grandparent's home.

Ted decides to give up on his GED because he was only doing it for Lisa. He's now a chicken full-time, until he is visited by Carrie and Stewart, where the later apologises for his actions and embarrassing him. Carrie demands that he takes the test and the next day, he shows up to take the exam. He does his hardest to compose himself and concentrate with the scene drawing to a close as the excited classmates show their results in the parking lot. Everyone passes except Teddy. Safe to say I didn't see that coming, little twist in there. We see him try the test several more times until finally he passes and everyone at the chicken joint celebrates. The night school then head to graduation, with Lisa in attendance. Teddy is picked to give a speech, he later apologises to Lisa and asks for them to have a fresh start, which she agrees too, kind of knowing that she may have put him under a bit of pressure. The class has some pictures and the movie ends with Stewart smashing some dance moves at the prom.

 

 

 

Scratch this down as a comedy that will be lost into others within a year. The storyline was ok, if not 95% predictable until part of the ending but then the main character ended up succeeding with his goal anyway. There was plenty of humour, some clever and some idiotic, which all would depend on the viewer whether they would find it funny or not. The movie was ok in that aspect from my opinion. It got me laughing a couple of times but I really cannot remember too much about which part these were a couple of weeks later, which isn't the best outcome. Each character did bring something different though, which I did enjoy. This meant that people could relate to more than one person in the movie and their struggles at times. Haddish played her usual, sarcastic role but when the time came for seriousness, it was delivered. I think we are now passed these types of movies and it felt like a 90's comedy at times and very much something we have already seen. Kevin Hart has done a lot better and will continue to do a lot better once this movie has been forgotten about.

 

I'm your father. You're mother forgot to tell you about me (The Equilizer 2 2018)

207.

The Equalizer 2 

 

 

 

 7.5/10

 

Big Denzel is back on our screens in another action filled movie that will hopefully do the first on justice. The first Equaliser movie was a non-stop rollercoaster of killing but will this live up to that or will I hate it for being just like John Wick which is just killing for the sake of killing with no decent storyline. I'm a massive fan or the action movies that Denzel Washington brings to the table and I'm in no doubt that this will end up being an enjoyable watch for me. Let's find out if it is equal.
We get action from the off as a disguised Denzel, playing Robert McCall, is on a Turkish train, kicking ass and taking names of a gent and his mates who have kidnapped his daughter from her mother.

 Once this kidnapper became aware of McCall's intentions, he orders his men to have a go but in style, McCall sets his watch and finishes the job. He then approaches the father and gives him a chance to take the easy way out. Back in Boston, the mother heads into her office to work and finds her daughter there, embracing her with tears.
McCall now works as a Lyft driver, picking up passengers like a private taxi. One of his regulars is a very old man, who is busy looking for his long-lost sister before it is too late. One night he is asked to take home a young woman who is clearly drugged and possibly raped, so after dropping her off at the hospital, McCall heads back to the guy's apartment to confront him and his mates, asking them to do the right thing. This doesn't go down well though and we end the scene with some more broken men.

In Belgium, a man named Mr. Calbert returns home to find his wife beaten and three men emerge before shooting the woman in the head. These three, named Resnik, Ari and Kovac, then force a gun into the mouth of Calbert and pull the trigger. We head back to McCall's and once again he is living in a small style apartment, making friends with the neighbours and when he finds out that one has had her garden vandalized and walls sprayed with graffiti, he takes it personally. He takes to take the paint down himself until he is met by a youngster named Miles. Miles and McCall interact quite often as McCall wants the best for him, not the life of drug selling. He offers to help sort out the graffiti for a price.
Later in the day, McCall heads to a bookstore to pick up a new one that he has ordered. Behind the desk, we see Grace, the mother from the earlier rescue and her daughter recognises him. The mother doesn't know the story or that McCall is the saviour. When he arrives back him, his old friend Susan is already there and they share a friendly meal on the anniversary of McCall's late wife's birthday. She tries to suggest that he gets out more. Once Susan returns home, she speaks to her colleague Dave, played by Pedro Pascal. This guy was class as the Viper in Game of Thrones until he got his head crushed. They are investigating the murder of that Calbert fella. They both fly out to the scene and quickly realize that something was up. Back at their hotel, Susan is set upon by two thugs and they shout something about money. She holds her own until she is cornered in her bedroom.
McCall is now watching as Miles paints the wall and then he gets a call from Susan's husband. He informs him that she had been murdered, leading to McCall to fly straight out to Washington DC and to the funeral. He later investigates the death by watching the security tapes and looking at the crime photos. At the thug's hideout, they are listening to music until a phone rings. They have no idea where it is coming from but after finding it, it explodes and the camera switches to outside where we once again see Resnik, who has tied up some loose ends. McCall then gets in touch with Dave, who didn't realise that McCall was still alive to this day. They discuss the death of Susan and then the thugs both realising that it was definitely a loose end killing. Overall, this has to be connected with the Colbert murder, but why?
McCall is back home, noticing that Miles is leaving with some local gangsters. He follows him, knocks out some guards, takes their guns and heads into their apartment, telling Miles to come home with him. The gangsters were going to help Miles get revenge for the killing of his brothers. This is the moment that Miles and McCall fall out after McCall tries to give him advice on it all.

 Back at his day job, he picks up a shady looking character who needs a lift to the airport. When he feels something is up, McCall intentionally goes the wrong way. The man doesn't bat an eyelid and when McCall admits this, the guy tries to stab him, leading to an in-car fight scene. The car is flung around like crazy to throw the guy around as much as possible. Then a gun is in play and McCall knows he needs to end this quickly. It ends with a bullet and McCall takes the guys phone and finds coded information on it before burning the car and the man's body. With everything escalating, he takes Susan's husband to a safe house before he can also become a loose end.
McCall heads back to Dave's with the phone. He meets his family and even sits down to breakfast. He then has a one-to-one with Dave and shows him the information he found, which leads back to another phone and not just any phone, DAVE'S. For some reason, McCall always knew and Dave instantly explains. When the gang thought that McCall was dead, they all got into some nasty business for more money. Susan nearly found out and they had to kill her. Dave takes McCall outside to meet the whole team that he trained and the lads that we saw kill Colbert. McCall promises them all that he'll kill them for what they did to Susan and then takes an offer of a lift from Dave's wife in some sort of taunt to him. Miles is back at McCall's place painting his kitchen and calls McCall just as some of the guys are trying to break into the apartment. He orders Miles to hide behind a bookcase but Miles starts to panic, giving away his position but the men don't seek him out because McCall calls Dave and tells him where to meet him. A little while later, Miles steps out and opens the apartment door but just as he thinks he's safe, he gets snatched.
McCall ends up taking the final fight to his old home town, which is being evacuated due to a hurricane. As the wind picks up, McCall takes out the men one by one, with Dave at the top of a tower with a sniper, only ever catching a glimpse of his enemy.

 He calls McCall and tells him that Miles is in the trunk of a car, as he starts shooting at it. Due to the crazy wind, he can't get a decent shot. This gives our hero time to climb the tower and fight Dave, killing him by slicing the back of his neck and chucking him from the tower to the rocks below to be swept away by the sea.
Miles is freed from his car styled cage and takes him to his old house to patch up his wounded leg. Miles finally sees pictures of McCall's past. Ones of him with his wife and ones of him in a soldier uniform. The two head home, finish the garden and wall and Miles is seen talking to a girl on the school bus who has taken an interest in the drawing that he's doing. Sam, the old man from the beginning is seen reuniting with his sister after McCall pulled a few strings to make it happen. This only leaves us with McCall's ending and he is seen back at his old house, standing outside and staring out onto the ocean like a widow.
To be fair, this movie was exactly as I expected. Watching Denzel kick ass once more and all in the name of good. It took me a long time to see the first movie and I loved it so when I noticed this was coming out, I got excited. Washington reprises his role with ease, making it look easy to flip between a soft-hearted helper to a complete assassin when need be. Every other character brought a little something to the table and seeing Pedro as a villain once more is showing his ability to play a loveable character and a hated one. And I truly hated his character in Kingsman, but that was just because I hated the movie. There was a decent spin on the storyline as McCall's old team became the villains but there wasn't too many twists and turns that would confuse us. It was just the right amount. With the ages getting on and with both movies coming out strong, part of me hopes that a third installment doesn't come. I don't want this turning into the Taken franchise which easily overstayed it's welcome by making a third. It felt like a peaceful end to a good duo of movies.



He's a killer dressed up as a hero (Mile 22 2018)

 

 

 

206.

Mile 22

 

 

 

 

7/10

 

Mark Wahlberg brings us some more quick wit, attitude and action as he turns away from some Transformers and instead becomes an elite intelligence officer who is trying to smuggle a mysterious witness out of Indonesia by any means necessary. With quite an array of a cast, John Malkovich and Ronda Rousey included, this movie doesn't scream masterpiece but a decent looking action/crime story that has the potential to be forgotten. Let's get into it and find out if this is going to be a mile too far.
The story begins with our team of agents staking out and trying to infiltrate a known safe house for the Russian FSB and their agents. Alice and William pretend to be a lost couple, looking for an address as John Malkovich's character, Mother, watches over them by satellite. Their job is to retain the cesium that the Russians may be holding and using to create weapons.

 

 

 Wahlberg's character, James Silva and another team moving are closing on the house from the back begin the breach and after some bullet, a finding of a hidden room and plenty of killing, we draw to a close as the team burns the house down. The news of the job travels fast amongst some circles and even more so regarding the fact that someone called Anatole was involved. We then get our opening credits, as we see James Silva's life growing up. Recruited by Black Ops not long after the death of his family and the movie is broken up into pieces of Silva giving a testimony about an operation that had taken place.
16 months later and the team is now in Indonesia, where the main part of the movie will be taking place. Still hunting for the cesium, Alice, played by Lauren Cohen, says that she has a source that can help them. Silva though is very hotheaded. He wants action now, rather than sitting around waiting for information. Silva turns his attention to a woman who walks in, needing help because the government wants to seize her assets. Alice, on the other hand, has to speak to her ex-husband who won't let her see her daughter. They all catch a break though, as a local police officer comes to the Embassy's gates to surrender himself and a disc he is carrying that he claims holds information about where the cesium is being held. In return, he wants safe passage out of the country. Li Noor is his name and with no kind of emotion on his face, he passes over the disc but tells the team that it will be wiped in a matter of hours if he isn't granted asylum in the States.

 

 

 Elsewhere, we finally catch a glimpse of some villains. A group of Russain agents led by a female named Vera. They are monitoring Li's location as they are definitely planning on having the bugger killed.
Li is taken to a medical room for tests as some Indonesian intelligence officers arrive and demand that Li is handed over to them but the Ambassador doesn't allow it. Back in the medical room, Li is set upon by some agents disguised as doctors and even whilst handcuffed, he smashed the shit out of them and stands down once he's done. Alice and Sam find out that he was once Special Forces. The plan is to move Li to an airstrip to get him out of the country and this airstrip is 22 miles away, hence the movie title. They are going to take a convoy or armoured cars, Bishop or 'mother' is going to watch from every camera going and we even learn out why Li is doing this. He is going against the government because they are the reason that his family are dead. Finally, we hit the road and are instantly in trouble. Axel, the man in charge of the Indonesian Special Ops from early, sets a team on motorbikes to plant explosives on the cars. Some of the team are killed as the bullets then begin to fly on the streets. Sam, played by Rousey is badly injured and even with the help of Li, the team is ready to escape as more of Axel's men set in. Silva leaves Sam with some grenades, knowing she isn't going to live and so that she can take some enemies with her. Rouse wasn't around for long.
The team head into a restaurant and take residence for a while with the owner that they know will protect them. Outside, Axel is waiting for a chat with Silva and once again he asked for Li to be handed over. When Silva heads back inside following a simple 'no' to Axel, he brushes past to girls and notices they have grenades. Another attack brings injuries and the team is once again on the run. One of the gang, Douglas, picks up some bad injuries but Bishop doesn't want failure and orders the team to get to the strip now.

 

 

 Instead, they head to a safe house that Alice knows inside a massive block of flats. As some enter, Silva and Doulas stay outside to fend of Axel and his lot. Silva is then next to enter as Douglas is taken down and shot in the head. Inside, Alice has a run in with a henchman and almost gets killed before Li finds a gun and saves her. This guy really wants to escape.
We have finally made it to the airstrip, after a short car chase and Bishop or 'mother' sending a drone to take out Axel in his car. Getting onto the plane, Li gives up the code to unlock that disc he first handed over. As Li walks up the steps, he tells Silva to 'Say hi to Mother for me'. Mind melt! Before Silva can ask what that meant, the door is closed and the plane is on its way. Bishop or Mother can see that Li's heart is racing. The disc turns out to contain nothing other than a picture of Anatole. This Anatole guy was the one running the Russian house at the beginning. His mother has hired Vera and the gang to kill the people responsible for killing her son. Li has been working as a triple agent, working the Americans so that everyone can be taken down and killed. A team is sent in to kill Overwatch and Mother, as Li turns to Alice, who is on the plane with him and utters the words, 'Gotcha'.

 

 

The movie ends with Silva finishing his debriefing that we have seen shorts glimpses of. The last scene is of Silva putting up a picture of Li, maybe symbolising him planning revenge.
I hate to say that I'm right but in my opinion, I am. It was a movie that contained a decent, if forgettable storyline, for most of the movie but the ending actually gave me something different and this is the reason why the score isn't too bad. I've been saying for a long time how we always get a predictable ending, where the good guys always get the win. This time it was really, really refreshing to get some villains on top by the end. This was the only thing that truly stood out. There were plenty of actions scenes, whether they be with weapons of hand to hand combat, which kept the audience entertained but a lot has been seen before. Wahlberg gave a very Mark Wahlberg account of himself. This meaning that there was plenty of bad attitude to anyone that didn't agree with his character and once again, by the end, it was good to see his comeuppance. That's not saying I'm not a fan of his, just that the kind of character he played usually always comes out on top.

Whatever you do, don't stop praying (The Nun 2018)

205.

The Nun 

 

 

6/10

 

With The Conjuring franchise being at the top of my list when it comes to horror movies, a smaller instalment that has grown from the popularity of this ghostly 'Nun' figure as lead to a Halloween full of different takes on the costume. When it comes to the movie, part of me was excited to see what was in store but at the same time, very apprehensive, as the conjuring movies were based on true events and this was just a filler to appease the audience. I have no idea where this will rank between the Conjuring and Annabelle movies but after seeing the trailer countless times, there was one part that constantly got a little jump out of the audiences. This though, seems a little spoiler for the viewers, knowing what was going to come at that point. It about time to find out if this going to be making say 'holy shit' or want us praying for it to end the torture.

Set in 1952, we are following a known beginning of a horror movie as we instantly get a glimpse of death. Two nuns are walking a hallway, coming across a door labelled 'God ends here'. The oldest goes in to grab an artefact whilst the youngest stays outside to pray. The older comes back again, bloodied and beaten, telling Victoria to stop praying and run, before she is soon pulled back into the darkness. Victoria picks up the artefact, which is a key and runs for a window, being closely followed by the demon nun named Valak. She begs God for forgiveness before launching herself out of the window, hanging herself and bringing an end to the scene when sometime later, a guy named Frenchie finds her decaying body.

At the Vatican, it's kicking off when the higher-ups learn of the ultimate sin of suicide by a nun. They send Father Anthony Burke to check things out and he decides to enlist the help of a young nun-trainee named Sister Irene. The pair head off to Romania to find Frenchie, who can then, in turn, take them to where he found the body. As soon as Frenchie and Irene are on the screen together, there is an instant connection and we have the love interest that sometimes comes with a horror. Frenchie takes them to a delivery building's icebox and to Victoria's body, which he left lying down but is now sitting up. Burke pries open her frozen fingers and finds the key that she was holding. They give her a proper burial and as the start to enter the abbey, Burke notices fresh blood in the area that Frenchie found the body. They head into the chapel and meet with the Abbess, who explains that they are having a vow of silence for Victoria and they must actually wait until tomorrow to enter the actual Abbey.

Burke and Irene settle into their rooms as Frenchie heads home now that his job is done. To be fair, doubt that's the last we see of him. On his way home, he sees a vision in the woods of someone resembling the dead girl Victoria. He follows her and ends up being attacked by a demon nun. He picks up a cross and heads off. Back in their rooms, Burke and Irene are confiding in each other. Irene, when younger, had visions that contained a phrase saying 'Mary points the way' and Burke was unable to save a boy from his injuries during an exorcism. That night, Burke is woken by music, goes on the search and ends up seeing a demonic version of a little boy. The vision pushes him into a coffin and buries him alive. He rings that bell that is set up at grave sites for anyone buried by mistake and he's found by Irene. Irene had been woken and wandered the halls for a while. She even passed a mirror and seen the figure of Valak attacking her. At the grave, pulling Burke out, demon hands are seen pulling him back under but after being freed, he looks back into the coffin to find books on the occult.

 

 

 

The next day, only Irene is allowed to enter the abbey and after meeting Sister Oana, she learns that the sisters actually have shifts of praying in order to keep the evil away. We are treated to a history lesson and how Valak came to be. In the dark ages, a Duke obsessed with powers from hell caused a rift to summon Valak. Guys found him and killed him before he could complete the ritual. He was trapped inside hell using an artefact, the same one that the nuns from the beginning were looking for using the key and it contains the blood of Christ, apparently. As time passed, World War II hit and so did the bombs, breaking open the rift and finally releasing a Valak. Valak has taken the form of a nun and disguise itself, praying on their weaknesses. Burke has had bugger all to do so learns about the demon and its name.

Frenchie has made it to a pub, good lad, knew it wouldn't be the last time we see him. He overhears someone talking about a young girl killing herself by hanging after seeing something horrible. Frenchie tells the bartender of the couple that has gone up the abbey and is told back that they could be the next victims. Back up the abbey, Burke I still trying to get into the place. The Abbess tells him that he will never find another way in. This bird seems like she is a skeleton, there is nothing to her but we cannot see anything under her black robe. He tries to ask about the key they found but she's having none of it and even mentions that it is too late for Irene. The Abbess then goes limp and as Burke tries to unveil her, a demon hand grabs him until he tears it off of her. Irene has woken after seeing another vision of Valak. She creeps the corridors, as anyone would do at the dead of night and is attacked by the crazy nun demon thing. Burke hears the commotion and heads off to save Irene, which he doesn't do very well but in walks Frenchie and a shotgun. Irene runs to the other nuns and starts to pray with them as the place beings to shake. An evil force carves symbols into her back and as she looks around, she notices the other nuns are nothing but visions.

 

 

 

Irene, Burke and Frenchie team up for what seems like the main battle and they realise that Victoria was never committing suicide. She killed herself so that she wouldn't become possessed. They head into the tombs and find the blood artefact, knowing they will need to use it. Searching for it, guess who points it out. That right, Mary points the way, just like Irene's young visions. Sure enough, they find the vial and soon Valak appears, attacking the trio. The demon begins to try and possess Irene as Burke is attacked by the child he tried to exorcize. Irene becomes a tad possessed but Frenchie launches some blood and her to bring her back around. Valak chucks a dark force at him and then tries to drown Irene. As the water hits this demon, the makeup runs down its face and it truly looks terrifying. Pulling her back out of the water, Valak notices that the vial is broken and Irene, looking like she has had one too many beers, spits the blood all over the demon's face.

 

 

 The demon falls back through the rift and the door to hell is closed. As the trio leave the abbey, Frenchie reveals his true name but something more is revealed to the audience. An upside-down cross is burnt into his neck. That isn't good. Could he be the anti-Christ? But then why would he be helping?

The film franchise always has an ending linking to the other movies. It's a clip from the first movie where Carolyn is watching Ed and Lorraine giving a seminar on their encounter with a possessed lad. It's Maurice, who later kills himself. His grabbing of Lorraine gave her the visions that she now sees and for her, it wouldn't be the last time that she would see Valak.

This movie was something that The Conjuring fan base asked for after first setting sights on this evil nun but was it really needed? In my opinion, no. I love a horror as much as the next fan but taking into context the other movies in the franchise, this has to be the weakest. Firstly the characters are easily forgettable apart from the demon itself. We only ever see one again, Frenchie, who they link in with the first Conjuring movie by replacing a cameo role with this newer actor. This is the part of the movie I commend because I always enjoy when they can link the storyline up in such a way. There wasn't going to be anything else connecting to the others so this storyline was OK, religious and creepy but that's pretty much where it ends. The horror portrayed in the movie is carried in the usual context of dark corridors, sudden movements and lack of music leading to a jump scare. Each part of this was relatively predictable but still enjoyable to a degree. The nun itself was actually pretty creepy to look at, especially towards the final fight scene which involved the water, making it even more daunting to look at. The film felt like the filler that these ones have become, whetting the appetite for more but never really proving itself as the main course. It's never going to be up there with the others and not anywhere near the halfway point on my favourite horrors, even after the anticipation I had for this movie. Overall, I felt a little let down compared to what James Wan had brought us before.