106.
King Arthur: Legend of the Sword
4/10
Why wouldn't a film that David Beckham had acting lessons for not work out? We are about to find out. I didn't go into this with any high hopes of a blockbuster after hearing reviews from friends and family. The trailer looked like another 'Great Wall' with decent effects but the ability to be just that. With the hot property right now of Charlie Hunnam as Arthur, Jude Law as the main villain and a group of Miss fits know throughout British films, Guy Ritchie was hoping this medieval fantasy tale was going to smash it. I enjoy mythology and medieval times so that could be one to draw me in.
We start will a story from long ago in the Dark Ages and a Mage called Modred attack all castles in order to take over with his dark magic. Riding to Camelot on the back of war elephants, bigger than those in the Lord of the Rings finale, he comes face to face with Eric Bana who plays King Uther. With his own army, he makes his way to Modred and one swing of Exaclibur, which gives him extra power shown through some blue twinkles in his eyes, chops off the head of the evil Mage and brings his reign to terror to and end. Soon after Uther's brother, whose name is too long to worry over so we'll just call him Jude Law, leads a gang against the King because he isn't happy that all of the mages aren't being hunted down to stop another rose in the future. He takes his own wife deep down to a dungeon type pit and kills her, in order to get a stronger form from spilling her blood. Uther manages to get his wife and son Arthur out of the castle as Jude's minions are closing in on them. As the Blacklegs, Law's minions start smashing the place up, the family is led to the docks just as a mysterious dark figure appears and hurls a spear at the wife and kills her. Arthur is put onto a small body and asked to escape whilst his father tackles this tall figure.
Arthur is discovered by a trio of ladies and taken to a brothel to be raised, a few cut scenes happen along with some strange music that can only be described as a pervert heavy breathing down a phone mixed with someone slamming two wooden spoons onto a saucepan. The scenes are showing Arthur growing up, picking fights and earning money in anyway possible, saving it in a hidden box. As an adult, now being played by Hunnam, he's grown stronger and cocky, making friends with Rubio and Percival. He's become a sort of bouncer for the brothel and looks after the women who looked after him when he was younger. He tends to his friend Lucy who had been manhandled by a group of Vikings. He heads off to the docks to handle the business and get money off them as an apology, chopping the leaders beard off as a token of revenge. Getting back to the brothel, the blacklegs are raiding looking for a man who shouldn't be there. Arthur gives him up without wanting trouble for his 'family' but talk soon turns to the Vikings and that they were protected by the king. He's sent to the Kingdom to pay for his crime but not before trying to escape and Lucy is killed in front of him and the other girls after him trying to save them from being mixed up in his own troubles.
We head back to see Vortigern, Jude Law, and he's speaking to the sirens that are living in that pit who granted his powers. They are depicted as three squid like creatures, one hideous and the other two are decent lookers apart from the many arms. They explain that once he manages to kill Arthur, and takes the power that the sword gives, he will then succeed. He now learns that the sword has been found in a stone under the ocean. Arthur, along with many people his age are being marched towards the stone to have a go at pulling it out of the stone. Pushing his way to the front, he wants to get this out of the way and carry on with his life. Step up Dai Becks. My god, he's meant to play a blackleg so there has to be some sort of presence on the screen if your having lines. In his worst accent going, shouting at Arthur at how to pull a sword out and then switching to him in slow motion ordering the troops to capture him was easily the worst and most cringe worthy moment of the film. So yea, Arthur has stepped forward and slowly felt the sword move out of the stone, seeing flashes and too much power to control he passes out and wakes up in a dungeon with Jude Law staring at him holding his crown. A quick exchange means that Arthur is filled in with who he is, who is father was, that he can control the sword and that Law has every intention of holding it all for himself so Arthur must be dealt with.
Meanwhile Uther's former General and one of the only decent actors in this movie is met by a female Mage, although he isn't too happy to see her. She was sent by Merlin to help Arthur escape and she's going to need, Sir Bedevere's help. Arthur is obviously sentenced to execution and if he refuses to act like a coward instead of the hero that all the people have come out to see, Law will kill the rest of his lady friends. Once his head is on the chopping board, the Mage controls some Eagles to attack the guards and dogs to chase others whilst men appear and help Arthur with his escape. They take him to a hideout in the forest where they have been hiding out and plotting to defeat Vortigern. There, he meets Bill, the guy who he gave up in the brothel earlier. Played by the same guy who plays Petyr Baelish, it's hard not to see him as anything else. Arthur refuses to help them as the others put doubt in his mind that he is who he actually is but he knows this is just to try and wind him up. He sucker punches Bill and tries to swing the sword but he passes out again. Once he wakes, Bedevere explains how Modred and Arthur's uncle were working together all along to insure each other victory. Vortigern's new goal is too build the tallest Mage tower which had once been the source of the evil Mage's power and if he completes it, he would be unstoppable. Once the evil Mage got to power, the Lady of the Lake gave Excalibur to Uther in order to kill him.
As Arthur is not ready, the Mage decides its a good idea to take him to the Blacklands, where Merlin had destroyed Mordred's tower. Where the hell s Merlin? Surely he's coming soon. Being here, he can learn to control the sword. A few sped up scenes show him tackling all kinds of creatures and growing wary as he makes his way up the mountain. As he tried to grasp the power, he is thrown into the dreams he's been having about his mother's death and now he sees it was his uncle as the dark figure throwing the spear. His father tried to fight but is over powered and instead throws his sword into the air and lets it impale him. This turned him into stone, the stone he was pulling the sword out from and once Arthur realises this sacrifice, he's ready.
They all plan to meet barons from other Kingdoms in order to rally men which Arthur helps because he feels he knows exactly what will go down. In a series of clever cuts we are back and fore between the actual meeting and what Arthur saying what will happen and watching it felt like a meeting in a Cockney market, arguing about the price of fruit. Altogether it involves some of his own men and confrontations to show the Barons that Arthur is someone trustworthy. It comes to evidence of how they are getting certain information as Vortigern's maid is actually a spy as she brings information about the Vikings helping the evil side so when this meeting takes place, so will the attack. But something isn't right. Vortigern knows and sends out a decoy. The group in the tower ready to attack know this and want to pull out except for Bill, who wants to kill the people that earlier arrested him. This leads to a roof top chase with that music back for a second round and me shaking my head at the idea that this was used twice through this movie. They loose some men and take shelter in an earlier friends fight school but they are soon surrounded by Blacklegs and seeing his group in trouble is the push he needs to be able to wield the sword. one swing sees every flying and in a scene of dust and slow motion, he's killed the lot.
That night, Londinium is mental, everyone is trying to rebel and Rubio, one of Arthur's mates who got injured, shows up with his son at the dock to escape. They've been followed and Rubio gets asked the usual questions but he plays dull and so does his son who turns back up for his father after helping the other load. Trying to trick them into thinking he doesn't know the man he calls father, they test his resolve but cutting off Rubio's ear to which he screams. The boy must watch as Jude Law turns up and kills his father as Arthur is pulling him away.
Feeling like he's failed, we see a usual scene from the movies where Arthur chucks his sword away, not feeling worthy but he's pulled into a small pond by the Lady of the Lake and she shows him what will happen if he doesn't succeed. When he meets back with the troop, they head back to the hideout to find everyone else has been killed and the guy from Green Street who killed Charlie Hunnam, is there to deliver a message. If he doesn't give up, Law will kill the boy and the Mage. The Mage is released when Arthur goes to surrender but before anything can happen the Mage summons a giant snake to eat most people involved. They escape to free other prisoners to start a war against the Blacklegs. Knowing what's coming Vortigern takes his daughter to the same place he killed his wife and sacrifices her to regain is demonic form and take on Arthur. Taking him to a different relm to fight him, he ends up overpowering Arthur but as the usual feel goods go when dished out for movies, he sees his father who tells him its time to use the sword. Once impaling him, he leaves him to die as the tower crashes down around him.
A while later we are dealt a glimpse of the famous roundtable being built as he knights everyone on his friends. He cuts ties with the villainous Vikings to avoid any more fighting and makes them drop to one knee before inviting them over for some food. Arthur is then presented with his new crown and as he lifts his sword aloft, the kingdom cheers.
Ok so it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be but it still wasn't great. The casting out of the major few characters felt like Guy Richie had been down the pub and asked the local drunks if they fancied being in a movie with David Beckham and they stayed drunk throughout. With some awful accents that I could have done without, the emotion of people dying felt forced and unreal. The special effects were brilliant to be fair and it was probably the saving grace but all the talk of Merlin and him not showing up was quite the let down. I'm still not sold on Jude Law either and to have him as the main villain, I felt like it could have worked better with someone else.
As Arthur is not ready, the Mage decides its a good idea to take him to the Blacklands, where Merlin had destroyed Mordred's tower. Where the hell s Merlin? Surely he's coming soon. Being here, he can learn to control the sword. A few sped up scenes show him tackling all kinds of creatures and growing wary as he makes his way up the mountain. As he tried to grasp the power, he is thrown into the dreams he's been having about his mother's death and now he sees it was his uncle as the dark figure throwing the spear. His father tried to fight but is over powered and instead throws his sword into the air and lets it impale him. This turned him into stone, the stone he was pulling the sword out from and once Arthur realises this sacrifice, he's ready.
They all plan to meet barons from other Kingdoms in order to rally men which Arthur helps because he feels he knows exactly what will go down. In a series of clever cuts we are back and fore between the actual meeting and what Arthur saying what will happen and watching it felt like a meeting in a Cockney market, arguing about the price of fruit. Altogether it involves some of his own men and confrontations to show the Barons that Arthur is someone trustworthy. It comes to evidence of how they are getting certain information as Vortigern's maid is actually a spy as she brings information about the Vikings helping the evil side so when this meeting takes place, so will the attack. But something isn't right. Vortigern knows and sends out a decoy. The group in the tower ready to attack know this and want to pull out except for Bill, who wants to kill the people that earlier arrested him. This leads to a roof top chase with that music back for a second round and me shaking my head at the idea that this was used twice through this movie. They loose some men and take shelter in an earlier friends fight school but they are soon surrounded by Blacklegs and seeing his group in trouble is the push he needs to be able to wield the sword. one swing sees every flying and in a scene of dust and slow motion, he's killed the lot.
That night, Londinium is mental, everyone is trying to rebel and Rubio, one of Arthur's mates who got injured, shows up with his son at the dock to escape. They've been followed and Rubio gets asked the usual questions but he plays dull and so does his son who turns back up for his father after helping the other load. Trying to trick them into thinking he doesn't know the man he calls father, they test his resolve but cutting off Rubio's ear to which he screams. The boy must watch as Jude Law turns up and kills his father as Arthur is pulling him away.
Feeling like he's failed, we see a usual scene from the movies where Arthur chucks his sword away, not feeling worthy but he's pulled into a small pond by the Lady of the Lake and she shows him what will happen if he doesn't succeed. When he meets back with the troop, they head back to the hideout to find everyone else has been killed and the guy from Green Street who killed Charlie Hunnam, is there to deliver a message. If he doesn't give up, Law will kill the boy and the Mage. The Mage is released when Arthur goes to surrender but before anything can happen the Mage summons a giant snake to eat most people involved. They escape to free other prisoners to start a war against the Blacklegs. Knowing what's coming Vortigern takes his daughter to the same place he killed his wife and sacrifices her to regain is demonic form and take on Arthur. Taking him to a different relm to fight him, he ends up overpowering Arthur but as the usual feel goods go when dished out for movies, he sees his father who tells him its time to use the sword. Once impaling him, he leaves him to die as the tower crashes down around him.
A while later we are dealt a glimpse of the famous roundtable being built as he knights everyone on his friends. He cuts ties with the villainous Vikings to avoid any more fighting and makes them drop to one knee before inviting them over for some food. Arthur is then presented with his new crown and as he lifts his sword aloft, the kingdom cheers.
Ok so it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be but it still wasn't great. The casting out of the major few characters felt like Guy Richie had been down the pub and asked the local drunks if they fancied being in a movie with David Beckham and they stayed drunk throughout. With some awful accents that I could have done without, the emotion of people dying felt forced and unreal. The special effects were brilliant to be fair and it was probably the saving grace but all the talk of Merlin and him not showing up was quite the let down. I'm still not sold on Jude Law either and to have him as the main villain, I felt like it could have worked better with someone else.
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